the Answer to this question is this
connect a push button swith to ground and rst pin

click upload then push the button twice (fast)
(doesnt matter if your computer does not recognize the pro micro)


repeat this if it failed (repeat until you will conquer victory!)

after this the pro micro port will comeback to life! hahaha

I tested it. the reason I think is that you upload in a wrong board 
Commonly the 3.3v and 5v (vice versa)